Rule of Three

World Wide Wrestling - Session 4

Suplexing Hitler

The wrestling world is still reeling from the impact of the last OTW event, where almost the entire roster vanished into a time vortex. The only remaining wrestler is Jean Loup-Garou, and an packed RSL audience watches him reel drunk around the ring, complaining that no-one will come fight him. Suddenly the big display TV comes alive with static, and in it can be seen- El Gastro! The loo-chador shows the audience that he was thrown back in time to 1945, where he met Winston Churchill and suplexed Hitler. He then fell through time to 2014, where he existed in a ghost-like form, haunting the East Brunswick RSL as Over the Top Wrestling was formed – yes, it was El Gastro who actually was behind the mystery of the curse! Finally, El Gastro materialises in an explosion of static and sparks, returned to this reality and determined to rescue the rest of the OTW roster. He and Jean put aside their differences and hook up the remaining weird machines to the glitterball over the ring, which briefly pulls Lady Insane back to 2016 – she takes their hands and they all disappear again.
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Mars, 2066. The red planet has been subjugated by the armies of Emperor Trump, led by the mad scientist Doktor Colossus, who now amuses himself with death matches in his battle arena. With most of the OTW in stasis pods (including RSPCACE!), a weary Debra comes out to fight a championship match against the Highwayman, now enslaved by mind control implants, in front of a crowd of human soldiers and dejected Martian prisoners. But before the match can start, Lady Insane, Jean and El Gastro appear in a shower of sparks and glitter! They call out Doktor Colossus, but he refuses to fight as this is a singles match. Lady Insane objects that she is the #1 Contender, and Colossus is forced to turn it into a triple threat. With her friends held back by armed soldiers, Lady Insane convinced Debra that they need to work together to take down the controlled Highwayman – once he is out of the ring, they fight one-on-one for the Championship title! The battle is fierce, but Lady Insane takes advantage of the lower Martian gravity to get the upper hand and overpower Debra – only for the Highwayman to return to the ring! Lady gets him in a submission hold, rips out the mind control implants and pins him – she is the new Ultimate Champion! The crowd goes wild, and the Martian prisoners rise up to fight back against the human oppressors!

With their army and plans in tatters, Doktor Colossus and his tag partner Glamazon head for an escape shuttle, only to be faced by El Gastro and Jean Loup-Garou – former enemies, now teaming up to form a new tag team. It’s a four-way fight! Jean and El Gastro do their best, but their opponents have the advantage of teamwork and experience, and soon take the advantage. Faced by a beating at the hands of Glamazon, El Gastro tries a new and appalling tactic – he drops his tights and… um… well… look, he poops himself. Just rivers and rivers of shit, all over the ring. The tactic is so shocking that the forces of evil lose all focus, and before Doktor Colossus can (reluctantly) pin El Gastro for the win, Jean pulls him crotch-first into the ring posts, then rolls him up for a three-count. El Gastro and Jean Loup-Garou are the new tag team champions!

In the aftermath, Jean throws Glamazon directly at Doktor Colossus, activating the time-travel circuits in their tag team belts, and all of the OTW roster are explosively returned to 2016. The crowd goes wild! The new champions are held aloft (except for the shit-covered El Gastro) and vow to stop the terrible future of 2066 from ever taking place! The curse is lifted from the RSL!

And the Network 10 executive offers Sadie Sledge a five-year contract to bring Over the Top Wrestling (okay, except for the pooping-in-the-ring part) to national television. Everybody wins!

…someone please get a mop and some bleach.

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